Come Again?

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As it is, I’ve always been capable to create things, make people, set trends, but most of all I’ve been able to create a language that only I & another individual, and on occasion a group, could only decipher. But being a sea horse, or octopus, or otter rather, out of the Pacific Ocean, using my Californian lingo in the Middle West, or on the other side of the globe because after all I am global, I come across as a little [more] foreign. Pun intended. Some of the things I say sound off. People don’t really understand me, and it has nothing to do with the fact that I talk fast and just am a fast paced person in general, but what’s interesting is seeing the reaction when one hears my lingo and then their reaction when they learn what that lingo is translated to. What’s more interesting is catching those people use my lingo! Oh, to being a trendsetter, and not just a jetsetter. [champagne glasses cling]. Don’t forget who made you!

For instance, the word ‘down’ has multiple meanings, to me. It could mean a form of bravery. It can act as a proposal for something, etc. I’m not here to explain myself. ‘Bust’ is a MAJOR one. I mean it as laughing [really hard]. It’s funny because the things I create end of sticking to other people & what’s even funnier is that people who don’t like me, for some odd reason, because why would anyone not like me? I mean, I me, what is there not to like? Wait! I can think of a few,,, my youthful looks, my hot body, my sense of style, my ambition, I’m well-travelled, I’m educated, I’m published, I’m from LA, I’ve been on TV, the radio, the internet, need I say more?!? Wow, am here I am wondering why some people don’t like me,,, [emoji looking up with my hand on my chin] I will add, as I have said it before, if I was not me, I would sooo date me. Anyhow, it amazes me how people who don’t like me still have the nerve to use my shit! Don’t forget who made you, bitch!

I have had to bust a “Jawbreaker” and tell a few bitches, “don’t forget who made you!” When bitches get out of line, and quite the bitches get out of line. I swear, people take my kindness for granted. But once you have crossed that line, there is a point of no return.

Speaking of loose terms, or just plain loose, I couldn’t help but bust [laugh] because when I, one of the few low millions, sadly, was watching “Scream Queens,” they started talking about ‘ghosting’ and what it “really” means. Nothing belongs to anything. All the examples of ‘ghosting’ seemed legitimately correct. I’ll leave you to watch the episode and determine for yourself. Maybe then the viewership will jump up 10, or so. LMFAO! I like “Scream Queens.” I think season 1 was great!

Back to me, as always. I was busting because I was having 2 different conversations with 2 different people at 2 different times, OK, maybe it was like with 5 different people, because some times I am a chatty Cathy, and when Cathy is around, I’m chatty Patty. Patty is never around because that bitch is an attention whore and we can’t be in the same room together. Anyhow, we were conversing, and I was like, OMG! OK, not really OMG, more so oh my god! and I was like, yeah, and then I had to ‘bust a mission.’ The listener then looked at me a little confused and was like, what did you say? I was like, oh yeah! I forgot, I basically had to spell everything out as if I were a teacher in China teaching English to people who were going to forget in an hour and had to have regular talk. I then was like, oh yeah. [lol in my mind. But then it wouldn’t be ‘ol’ just ‘l’ or giggle] and then I had to clarify myself and by this time I was exhausted explaining what I am trying to explain about and be like, I went out of my way and jumped through hoops of fire, and then I was like, wait, I have to explain what I mean by hoops of fires,,, and then I was over it and was like, bitch, I’m over you like I’m over my job, and I am soooo over my job! Common sense is not so common. Gee, can I get a water break.

I was then talking to my stalker, and I was like, dude, you’re burning me out! And this person was like, what do you mean by that? And this person wouldn’t shut up about ‘burning me out.’ I wanted to shout, what f’n planet are you from?!?! It means you’re getting on my f’n nerves! And then I realized I had no room to talk because I’m originally from Neptune before I settled in California, so I was like, that’s a ‘bust.’

I guess it’s all over! The brits [emoji with hearts in the eyes] have an odd sense of humour, which I love, and a broad sense of sarcasm. And some of the things they say sound really foreign. I guess it all depends on where you’re from. And no, I don’t mean that in a gang-bangin’ way, homie. I actually mean it. Like a certain crop of people who talk ridiculously absurd and ghetto to each other, and to anyone it sounds horrific, offensive, and ghetto, but to them it is love. I’m just like, get me out of here so I don’t have to hear this!! Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice! People are who they are. Speaking of people,,, The people from the south are in a world of their own! I can’t wait to check it out! Then I can really be like, ya’ll come back now! I’m glad I learned what ‘bless your heart’ means before I take a trip to the south and say that all over town only to be chased out by villagers with flaming torches! Imagine that? Some say ‘tomato,’ some say ‘toe-ma-toe’; some say ‘Otter,’ I say ‘genius.’ I will say what annoys me is the stereotype people assume of the people from ‘The Valley.’ & I mean the actual ‘Valley’ – The San Fernando Valley! Don’t get it twisted, bitch! Like how when people talk about ‘The Valley’ and refer to it and then they start saying, yeah, like totally, for sure! Like OMG! I’m just like STFU! First off, I don’t even know if that ever existed! And second off, you’ve probably never been there and but act like you have but can’t seem to get out of your village of 200 –at the most! I’m just like, if anything, people talk gangster there! LMFAO!! JK! The Valley isn’t soooooo bad. I’ll just do anything I can to live as close to Ventura Blvd if I ever move back there. The Valley is home, well, Beverly Hills is home, but I’m H O P I N G you get the picture. I would say speak freely, but sadly you can’t really do that without being deemed as a racist or terrorist, or before someone considers your comment harassment, etc. Are we safe anymore? Hell – fuckin’ – no! This country is NOT what the founding fathers established, but that’s a whole other story!

Some of my favourite sayings that most people don’t [always] catch off guard, and no, I am not taking credit for these!

Bless your heart

Go die

Go pound sand

Go fly a kite

They shoot horses, don’t they?

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