I enjoy the great outdoors, I do. One of the reasons why I moved back to California was for the geography & the resources it offers. So, upon being back –which has been 2.5 years already! OMFGG! I try & make the most of my time. & by that I mean I go hiking as often as I can. I like running at the beach & hiking in the mountains & canyons. Yes, I even do it when it’s hot AF, which isn’t the smartest choice but if you want to get those toxins out & shed a few lbs, you gotta do what you gotta do & sweat.it.out! How’s that saying? NO PAIN, NO GAIN! I need to stop on the gaining! A little pain never hurt nobody. Or not.

I live by the infamous Runyon Canyon. I make myself hike on a weekly basis. I feel better about myself when I go multiple times a week. I don’t feel right knowing that I live right by it & am paying a lot for housing & not taking advantage of that resource. People always complain about the parking there. Welcome to L.A.. I hate the fact that it smells like dog piss all over the neighbourhood & that people only go there because they think it’s cool & trendy. Get over yourself, groupie! Stop trying to look hip & focus on looking fitter. That’s why you’re there, right?!? Another frequent hiking hotspot of mine is in & around Griffith Park. I like running in the neighbourhoods of Los Feliz & admiring the housing there. It’s inspirational. Moving west, as most hopefuls & wannnabes do, I like to hike in the Valley -San Fernando Valley that is. The only valley that matters to me, besides the valley of death… HAHAHA. Want a gOOd hike that’ll work you, see Caballero Canyon. I also like to hike in Malibu & Calabasas, or as I call it, Cali-bASSas. Those places are flushed with trails. A trail that has been on my list of things to conquer, for what seems like forever!, or 2.5 years: Fossil Ridge trail.

At Fossil Ridge, there are rocks with seashells in them! Would I know exactly what they look like in person? NO! Because I didn’t find them when I went for the first time. I found boulders with rocks in them. I’ll get more into that scenario in a moment.

Did you know that once upon a time everything on land, above ground, above current sea-level was once submerged? Once upon a time, Mount Rainier was just a cone that barely popped out of water. Once upon a time, the mountains at White Mountain in Bishop, California were once submerged. Hell, once upon a time, the Los Angeles River was once a river! It’s more like a stream of water now with algae. Global warming much?!? We also live in a desert. Crazy! That would explain why there are rocks in the mountains with seashells in them. I HIGHLY doubt the Santa Monica Conservancy hired a decorator to glue seashells in rocks & make the area look all pretty & festive & thematic to the ocean that lays right beside it.

I woke up from a slumber one morning & I was like, I’m going to go there! I am going to get this off my to-do list. Let’s see what the fuss is about. Put a big red slash across your name, not T.Swizzle status. Or maybe…? [Insert thinking emoji here]. Plus, feeling like a fatass also pushed me to go. Take a hike! Actually, I’ve never heard fuss about it. Someone told me once & it’s been on my mind. Curiosity ain’t killing this pussy!

I found the location. Thank God for Thomas Guide! I grew a little nervous when it came to parking my truck, Beverly, in the mountains on those narrow roads. The posted signs said, X miles this way, X miles that way for whatever trails, yadayadayada. No pictures/ maps. At least I didn’t see one. I had never been, so I was like screw it. It all wraps around, like most trails do. I’ll find my way back. Let a dog roam & he’ll find his way home. After the hiking, I had planned to go to the beach, another resource I came back for. I think the ocean is a whole other fascinating world! I like going to the beach when it rains. It’s so beautiful. It’s also kind of creepy at night but beautiful. Talk about blackness! Fast forward. I did 2 trails. I ended up on the other side of the mountain, not back where I started from. I was like, SHIT! I gotta walk back the same way I walked in! Mind you, I’m also in hippie area where there is no cell service, probably by vote. So be it! I needed to make sure I was correctly enroute. Note to self, & I ALREADY knew this: don’t trust technology. I mean… At least, don’t be so reliant on it. In certain circumstances, you need to think of the worst possible thing that can happen. Otherwise, think positive, get positive, just don’t test positive! Take more screenshots. My mobile detected where I was on a map but that was it. I couldn’t reroute myself. How many Gs is it going to take for service not so in the middle of nowhere!?! We’re already on 5, & that comes with a conspiracy! Who know what 10 will be like?!? XG? LMFAO. I laugh when I’m watching an old TV show & they’re all gaga over 3G! Or the really old movies where they claim cordless, now wireless, is an oxymoron!

I managed to get 1 bar of service in a spot after walking off a little. The map’s way of “wrapping around” / getting me back was having me go around the entire mountain not through it! I was like, OH HELL NO! I’ll get there at sundown! 5 hours later. Literally! What did I get myself into!?! Funny how I keep asking myself that… The last thing I needed to do was see a snake or mountain lion. I did see human life, so I was OK. I also saw what appeared to be the same butterfly throughout the entire time. It had the same pattern & colours. I highly doubt there was a cocoon community of all the same exact kind around. What are the odds?!? –nevermind! We’re BFFs now. Thanks for looking out & hanging with me & seeing me through. Not gonna lie, that butterfly was like a companion on this journey. Wilson?!? It was hot. Not as hell but hot. It was a winter’s day in hell. I can bare the heat, I’m from SoCal & didn’t always have an air conditioner while growing up. I had no water –on me! I was like, I have to do this! You want to be a fit bitch with no Fitbit! I headed back to retrace my steps. As I was going back in, a gent said, Oh, good luck, you’re going the hard route. Typical me! Unknowingly doing things the hard way! That’s life. I wanted to say, I saw you about an hour ago!?! I let him & his bitch pass, after checking both of them out.

OMG! Talk about boot camp! Whenever I travel somewhere, I usually walk all around the city. I don’t like ordering cars, Uber/ Lyft, unless I must. It’s become a rip off, a lot of the times. Plus, I can get acquainted with the city. Even though I live in Los Angeles & have a vehicle, I will still take public transit when I can. I don’t think I’ve ever walked this much! There were a few moments where I wanted to gag a little! I took breathers & stopped for a few moments, but I kept going. I didn’t stop & hang out & listen to the wind. I had already done enough of that. Mother Nature was singing those tunes the entire time. I wanted out! My light was hearing cars. I was like OK, I’m near the road I began! I was like, I’ll never come here again! I saw my Beverly baby from afar & wanted to give in, but I couldn’t. Daddy couldn’t break down in public. My feet & legs were hurting so much! Even my side started to hurt a little. I was TIRED! EXHAUSTED! It was as if I had just run a marathon! Literally. A lot of marathons aren’t the miles I just hiked. I’m a fast walker. I worked the shit out of my body! Hot body: here I come! When I got back to my truck, I pounded 2 bottles of water. At this point, I was so hot & sticky & dirty. I could feel dust all over me. I had no energy for the beach. I was dead tired but not THAT dead tired. I’m a pretty active person. Most who aren’t would’ve never made it. They would’ve waited on the other side of the mountain to be picked up, or if they had cell service, order a car & get dropped off back @ their car. Not me! I got myself in the mess, I’m getting myself out! The Indians had no other choice! The sucky thing? I didn’t even see the rocks with the seashells in them! I think they’re at another spot I passed upon beginning the trail. I was VERY tempted to find those fuckers, but I was like, have mercy on yourself. They’ll be there another billion years!

I got home. My body was in tingle mode. In a little shock. I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked refreshed, strangely. I didn’t look like an exhausted old bat. I took off my shoes. My white socks were near dark brown! Even my feet were dirty. You could see the imprint of my shoes. I was like, shit! After showering & unwinding at my atelier, I saw myself in the mirror again. I guess my vampirism was off at the moment. My soon-to-be hot body was no longer in shock after what it just went through. It was as if it was transforming! I know you can’t lose weight instantly or overnight, but I SWEAR! I looked thinner! I saw it in my face, I had less of a pudge in my gut, my thighs felt trimmer. I was like holy shit! I felt good! I had a clear mind. I felt exorcised. I didn’t have negative thoughts going through my brain. I felt so calm & chill. My vision seemed clearer. I felt like I had just finished a cleanse! A cleanse of which I need to do. The second time around, I said I would never do that hike again. Shit, I’m doing it again! I am a results-oriented person & I saw results. I just need to keep it up! Work myself harder. Hey, wanna feel thinner? Take a hike! Go on a 12.5-mile hike with sweats on in the middle of the day. What’s even crazier?!? I’m thankful for this one, this is PROOF to myself I’m physically active. I didn’t even wake up sore the next morning! 😊 Stretching does help. I stretch religiously. This was seriously a life changing hike! Maybe it also had to do with the fact that I was in the mountains & all the spirits around me.

Thank you, mother nature!

Namaste.